The Joys of The Internet

Hello, It’s been a while hasn’t it?

How are you?

Do you know, I knew you’d say that. Most people reply with; “Good thanks, and you?”

They then continue to walk away just as I start to tell them. Bit rude, really.

How are my what?
Yes, they’re still playing up. Apparently you can get special cream for them, but you know me.

Lactose intolerant.

This? It’s a laptop.
It runs on wiffy. That’s a technical term. My Grandson popped it round for me to have a sniff.

He’s been giving me a few lessons on how to surf the net.

Has what?

Have surf and nets got anything to do with sea fishing?

HAHA !! I can tell you’re new to all this.
Fishing is not a good thing on the internet, apparently.

Look, come and sit here, next to me.
Ooh, don’t wobble it. Your chubby knees aren’t cut out to hold a laptop, are they?

You wonder what that button does? I’ll press it and see.

Nothing’s happened. Oh well. It’s only small so it can’t be that important.

I am getting to be quite a good googly,
That’s a technical term as well, Nothing to do with cricket.

Now. let’s have a good old goggle.

Watch how it works. I’ll press the buttons. You aren’t as oafy as me with these things.

Think of a film you would like to see and I will find it for you.

What do you want to appear in front of your eyes?

Anna Sewell’s what?
Oh, I remember that film.
Lovely horsey film. Good choice. That’s quite unusual for you.

Right, So, Pay attention, are you watching?

This is all very technical.

So, I type in “Black Beauty” and … … … … OH! MY!
This is definitely not about a horse !

Will you stop laughing!!

What do you mean; “Well it appeared and could have your eye out?”

Plus he’s what like a horse?

I’ll find something else. Leave it to me. If I type ‘see more’ that should fix it.

OH! MY LIFE ! How is that even possible? I’ve only got a twelve inch screen.

Think of a different film, quick.

Ooh ! I know what to do … Last film I looked for before hitting that button …

‘FREE WILLY’. Here we go …

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